So, I was going to back this post up with census statistics and make it all a bit more informative, but then it became too hard and I don’t really care that much.

It’s no secret that Rivers is a fan of Japanese girls. Half-Japanese girls, too. Apparently they do it to him every time. Derp. Has anyone told him how close in proximity to Australia Japan actually is, and therefore how many half-Japanese and other Asian girls he can ogle over here? They don’t call this part of the world Australiasia for nothing.

Just sayin’, Rivers. Just sayin’…

 (photo yanked from Tokyo Fashion)

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I’m going to start with the obvious.

The cold hard cheddah. Duh.

Let’s face it. Compared to the Australian dollar, the US dollar is looking a little limp. Australia is fighting this whole Global Financial Crisis thing with a bit more fervour and dignity. For the first time in over 25 years, the Aussie dollar is worth more than the US dollar. Go team us, right?

So this is the deal: when Weezer tours their home country, their ticket prices run somewhere between US$50-80.

What Weezer may not completely realise is that us Australians are totally used to being completely ripped off when buying tickets, compared to our American counterparts. Also take into consideration the fact that there are so many neglected Aussie Weezer fans that would be practically frothing at the mouth at a tour announcement, money would be no object.

Thus, Weezer can price tickets for an Aussie tour extortionately and we would happily and gratefully bend over and take it with a shit-eating grin on our faces. We’re talking ~AU$100 a ticket here. 5 x tour dates, 5 x 6000 capacity venues, profit out the wazoo. And that’s before they even exchange it back into the measly US dollar.

And of course while they’re here, they can get a picture with one of these:

Adorable photo by Erik Verland

Lots of money and cute furry animals. How could anyone say no to that?